Hey everyone! It's Zoki. I just thought I'd say something, because I'm the one who brought this all up and kicked off the internal discussion. I thought you should know. After talking with mods and friends, I've realized that the doubts and fears that caused me to drop might actually be fixable. Maybe I'm not leaving after all---I definitely don't think I can handle the stress of the mod thing, but maybe I was too hasty. I gave up hope too fast.
Here's the part where I confess: the main reason I dropped was because I got caught up in an anxiety feedback loop about Trans 9's imminent death. I saw drops, not a lot of posts, and ill feelings and I held back and feared...and I don't think I'm the only one. I think I got caught up in worrying about the death and losing all of you so much that I forgot to relax and play.
In a way, I sort of became the Harold Camping of the game. Remember a year ago today, May 21st, 2011? (My apologies if you're already in the 22nd in your time zone). The final judgment was coming, the world as we knew it was supposed to end, and he knew the date. He used numbers to predict doomsday and some people got caught up in it and stopped living, focused everything on preparing for the end. I did that and forgot to have fun.
But the truth is...deep down, I don't really think that we're a lost cause. Maybe the world's not ending. We have a great mission before us: saving the universe as friends, kicking some butt, having some laughs, and all topped off with a cool ending that I still love. And I really think it can still work with a smaller crew.
But I let my inertia convince myself that it was soon going to be no crew. And...maybe that's not so.
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Here's the part where I confess: the main reason I dropped was because I got caught up in an anxiety feedback loop about Trans 9's imminent death. I saw drops, not a lot of posts, and ill feelings and I held back and feared...and I don't think I'm the only one. I think I got caught up in worrying about the death and losing all of you so much that I forgot to relax and play.
In a way, I sort of became the Harold Camping of the game. Remember a year ago today, May 21st, 2011? (My apologies if you're already in the 22nd in your time zone). The final judgment was coming, the world as we knew it was supposed to end, and he knew the date. He used numbers to predict doomsday and some people got caught up in it and stopped living, focused everything on preparing for the end. I did that and forgot to have fun.
But the truth is...deep down, I don't really think that we're a lost cause. Maybe the world's not ending. We have a great mission before us: saving the universe as friends, kicking some butt, having some laughs, and all topped off with a cool ending that I still love. And I really think it can still work with a smaller crew.
But I let my inertia convince myself that it was soon going to be no crew. And...maybe that's not so.